In the Beginning...

We left the hospital on Saturday and came home to a house full of loving grandparents, all very anxious to hold their new grandson -- carpe diem!!!

...

We woke up about 3 hours later refreshed and ready to begin this new adventure. So zealous. So optimistic. So determined. So... naive. We faced the first day with a level of determination that rivaled that of a new hire, fresh out of college and ready to solve all of the world's problems. It was our first day of school and Professor Miles was already establishing the rules of the classroom. No worries, we're ready. Aren't we???

We found out early that the professor has a lot of patience, but he is very clear on what he wants and how he wants it. You can spend a few moments interpreting what he is saying, but after a while you WILL get yelled at if you can't keep up.

We learned three new concepts; change me, feed me and entertain me (we think?). There is a distinct difference between change me & feed me. Earlier this week I got yelled at for misinterpreting feed me for entertain me. So, we are still working on the entertain me thing. It will come.

Relief is a three letter word - N.O.W. Grandma & I both found out that when Miles needs to go, he needs to go. Good thing we had a a fresh change of clothes.

Sleep is a four letter word -- H.A.H.A.

A 'full tank' and the 'chilliness' don't mix all that well. In the beginning it went a little something like this:

1. Carefully remove his clothes
2. Chat with him a little to keep his attention
3. Remove the straps from the diaper
4. Survey ground zero for #1 and/or #2
5. Remove diaper and set aside for disposal of the VERY cold baby wipe(s)
6. Wipe him with the VERY cold baby wipe(s) and discard it in the soiled diaper
   
7. Turn around to discuss our excitement for the wet diaper and/or BM
8. Grease up the front of the diaper with Vaseline
   
9. Carefully place the diaper underneath his butt
   
10. Carefully lift his butt and turn the diaper in the right direction
11. Neatly fold the the front of the diaper ensuring that the cute design still shows
12. Fasten the straps, taking great care not to cover the belly button
13. Repeat step #2
14. Change his clothes if they have a little pee on them and neatly swaddle him back into his blanket

The professor has tried yelling to let us know when he has gotten too chilly. However, since we had such a difficult time understanding, he schooled us on the art of the projectile stream. It caught us all off gaurd! As a result, we are much faster at changing his diapers, which now go a little something like this:

1. Pre-grease all diapers and prep any additional items prior to thinking about placing him on the changing pad
2. Peek through the side of the onesie and into diaper to verify a change is necessary
3. Unsnap onesie (be careful not to remove) and unfasten straps of the diaper wiping any residue with the clean part of the back of the diaper (all in one fluid motion)
   
4. IF additional cleanup is necessary, quickly wipe soiled area while placing new diaper beneath his butt and fasten straps over the cute design on the diaper (again, all in one fluid motion)
5. Ensure that belly button has not been mashed too bad
   
6. Fasten the onesie (whether it has pee on it or not) back and swaddle him into his blanket
   
7. Remove goggles

We are trying to get this down to a three step process. In the end, I am sure he will have us operating like a Nascar pit crew.

We have received some positive feedback. For instance:

• He enjoys talking so long as it doesn't interfere with either change me or feed me time
• He likes that we leave his hands free when we swaddle him
• He likes to walk around the house -- it helps him relieve a little frustration while trying to teach us new concepts

So far we seem to be doing ok. Mom has scored many brownie points on the subject of feed me and dad has made some headway with the change me concept. We still have some work to do on entertain me. It may be too early to tell, but we would say that we are right around the C+/B- range. It appears that we are getting better at it each day. We will just have to wait and see what the professor has to say in a few weeks.